All the feels

Tonight I sit upstairs in my bed listening to Sarah Brightman sing "Dust in the wind" and I am overcome with emotion as I reflect on today and the many days leading up to this one.

I have had so many people tell me that what me and my family did was huge, and while I understand the gravity of our decision to move to another country I still always felt that it was a more palatable decision than living in the toxic status quo.

Yesterday Randy and I sat with Micah Makayla and Kai and prayed over our house. We thanked God for all of the barriers that he pushed aside, all the silver linings to apparent road blocks, all the amazing and kind people he put in our path, all the times he whispered in our ear and directed our path. We prayed over the house that we find happiness safety and joy inside these walls.

I watched my children frolic today. I wish I could capture all of the picture worthy moments that I witnessed today. I watched pure wonder and joy and excitement and contentment on their beautiful faces and I felt peace.

Amidst all of the adjustments I have felt peace since arriving to New Zealand. I know that our path was God directed and thus God blessed. Every time I have a mind blown moment. Every time I see in real action a feature of this beautiful land that I came here for, our decision to move is validated. Every time I hear my US colleagues and friends lament about the suffocating systems that have no intention of releasing their grip, I am so relieved that I have found a different way. My love for medicine is reinvigorated even as I am out of my comfort zone and finding my way. I have more balance.

I am truly grateful for friends who still keep in touch and family that I can talk with and see on WIFI calling apps.

My heart is at peace and our kids are thriving. God is good.