Wise Words

So many thoughts, so many emotions. Checklists and countdowns and last times and one more times. Deadlines and documents and signatures and closings.

Twenty three days left before everything gets packed up onto the shipping container

Seven shifts left at the hospital

House sale is final in a couple of weeks

Thirty seven days till we board a non stop flight to Auckland, NZ

So much exhaustion, so much excitement. And amidst all of that, every once in a while, there is fear.

I cannot always articulate what I may be afraid of at the moment the feeling sneaks in. What I do know is that "the why" has never been in doubt and I am confident that where we are going has been selected as importantly for what it doesn't have as for what it has to offer.

I know that I am not naïve and I don't walk through life pleasantly in the dark about anything if I could help it. I know that all of our research and self- education and recon and discussion with Kiwis and American Expats have really given us as good a chance as any to walk through that portal with eyes wide open. I know that nothing will truly prepare us like experiencing the move will.

I do agree with Ms. Rosa Parks. The extended version of this quote says: “I have learned over the years that when one’s mind is made up, this diminishes fear; knowing what must be done does away with fear.” When you know what is and you know what must be, it is difficult to consider doing anything else. You cannot unsee what you have seen, unlearn what you have learned. And, if you are the type of person, as I am, who is committed to doing when presented with new information, decisions become very clear.

I will sit in my fear when it washes briefly over me, for I know that it does not mean doubt.